Maybe There Is Hope
by Hermione 2000
Summary: This is a bit of a one off for me, my first and last Hey Arnold fic, brought on by writer's block. OK, basically these are Helga's thoughts after finding out Arnold is going out with Lilah and the events that follow.


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Maybe There Is Hope...

A/N: I don't know what inspired me to write this but I've had writer's block and I was watching the 'Married' episode (the one where Rhonda has the origami marriage predictor and matches up Helga and Arnold. They have those weird dreams about married life etc) and I realised I've always wanted to write something from Helga's POV as I find her a fascinating character. I know there are many out there similar but I hope mine's a bit different. I'm kinda out of my depth here seeing as I only write Harry Potter but here goes; they're in high school and Arnold has finally won Lilah's affection and they're going out. These are Helga's thoughts and the events that follow:

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When Phoebe told me I couldn't believe my ears. Arnold and Lilah...together! The same Arnold who I've had a crush on ever since I first laid eyes on him and he told me he liked my bow and the same Lilah who took him from me and turned him into the driveling idiot, kissing her feet these past few years. Phoebe may well have suspected my feelings at this point because she looked nervous and made herself scarce. As I stood numbly in the corridor the conversation played through my head once more;

__

'Er...Helga?'

'What!'

'Um...I thought you ought to know...um, Arnold and Lilah are going out.'

Pause

'Helga? Helga? Are you OK?

Luckily, I pulled myself together.

'Does it look as though I care, Phoebe? Does it really look as though I care about Football head's and Miss Perfect's lives? What do you want me to do, sing and dance and be happy for them?'

It was as I broke into a little jig that she left.

It was inevitable, I told my self matter-of-factly as I forced my feet to start walking towards class, I'd noticed them becoming closer and closer for weeks but had foolishly dismissed it.

I saw him sitting next to her as I entered maths and I sat behind him next to Phoebe, trying to keep my face impassive. Phoebe must have noticed something, however, because she turned worriedly towards me;

'Are you sure you're O...'

'I'm fine, Phoebe,' I snapped back, not looking at her.

Something must have burst inside me that lesson because I directed more anger towards him than I can ever remember having done so. How I hated him. I hated the way he just sat there and was happy whilst I was in emotional turmoil, I hated his do-gooding ways and how everyone knew it would be alright because _Arnold _was there, but most of all I hated how he made me feel. I'm Helga G. Pattaki, I'm not supposed to have feelings like this. How can one person turn me into mush when they look at me? What right does he have?

Arnold bared my anger as he always had done. He didn't turn round at the name-calling, the spitballs, anything. I suppose deep inside something was telling me to stop it, telling me that this immaturity would never win his heart. But I didn't listen. I buried it under a mountain of anger and hatred.

Then Arnold did something that I can only ever really remember him doing once, when we were nine. He snapped. I was so shocked at this sudden turning of his gentle nature that, for a minute, all I could do was blink up at him. He'd swung violently round in his chair, got to his feet and started shouting at me, using language you wouldn't even use to scold your dog. Of course, after the shock had worn off, I retaliated, giving as good as I got.

That may have been the reason why we both received detention after school, putting books on the shelves and generally tidying the room.

'Way to go, Arnoldo,' I spat at him, as I crouched down to put some books on the shelf in front of me.

'Way to go? What do you mean "way to go?" You started it!' he retaliated from the other side of the room.

I was glad the furious tone had gone from his voice and he was back to the exasperation he always had when talking to me.

'Well, if you hadn't started yelling at me...'

'I was only yelling at you because you were annoying me, like you always do, and I guess that was just one time too many.'

I still had my back to him but I could tell he was clenching his teeth as he forced himself to speak calmly.

'If you weren't such a perfect, annoying little do-gooder you wouldn't get on my nerves and hen I wouldn't _have _to be mean to you. By the way, great yelling. I didn't know you had it in you,' I said.

'Thanks,' he replied coldly.

Neither of us spoke for a while until he came over and crouched down beside me. I was shocked, but not displeased, though I was determined not to look at him.

'Why _are _you so mean to me?'

It was a simple question but didn't deserve a simple answer. His tone was calm, even gentle, as if he were speaking to a very small child. I loved it when he took that tone of voice with me, it made me feel special, though he rarely ever did...of course I don't give him any means to. 

I replied to him simply though I couldn't resist taking a look into his warm blue eyes.

'Didn't I just tell you? 'Cause you bug me, you always have and you always will!'

'Why?'

'What?'

'Why do I bug you?'

For the first time, I faltered, deciding to incorporate some truth into the answer.

'Because...we're just _totally _different people. I mean, you're nice to people and help them with their problems, you're likable and popular and then there's me, horrible, selfish, mean to everyone, even to my best friend. Even an idiot can see why we hate each other.'

I took a deep breath after that, wanting to take back some of the emotion I'd said it with, knowing Arnold would surely pick up on it.

'I don't hate you.'

'_What!_'

'I don't hate you.'

His response was completely unexpected. The simple, four-worded sentence shattered all my defenses. I dropped the book I was holding and stared at him. 

'But...I....you...' I had no idea what I was trying to say but in that second I knew Arnold had seen me, perhaps for the first time, for who I really was. I could see by the look in his eyes that he'd seen past my cold exterior into the vulnerable little girl beneath. But within a moment it was gone, I built up the defenses again and snapped back;

'Yeah, well, you should, 'cause I hate you!'

I tore my eyes away from his as I said it and violently started stuffing the books back on the shelf.

'Suite yourself,' he said, getting back up. The annoyance was back in his voice as he continued. 'All I've ever done is try and be nice to you and if you hate me for it then that's fine.' He started to walk away.

I must have detected hurt in his voice because I stood up suddenly, deciding to do so on almost an unconscious level.

'Wait...Arnold!' I cursed myself for saying it but he stopped and turned to face me. I had to continue.

'I...er...' he waited patiently as I gathered the words together to form a sentence, which I gabbled out a top speed.

'Look, OK, maybe that was a bit harsh. OK, so I might not _hate_ you but I certainly don't _like _you. So, well...'

Getting uncomfortable that I was getting a bit sincere I switched back to how I usually spoke to him. Rudely.

'So, you don't have to get all _hurt _or anything, _and, _if you haven't noticed, the detention's over and I have food to eat, so get out of the door frame, get out of my way and LEAVE ME ALONE!

Almost embarrassed I stomped past him out of the classroom and down the corridor. I could still feel his eyes on me as I retreated and I half turned round to meet his eyes.

There was no anger there, just kindness and a smile on his lips that made me melt inside.

Maybe there is hope...

A/N. Oh dear, that was not good, sorry! I am English so I may have phrased some things un-American (it's a lot easier for me to write Harry Potter 'cause I know I won't get things like that wrong) but I have done my best. Don't worry, this was a one off, I'm not going to make a habit of it!!!:}

Disclaimer: I have no idea who owns Hey Arnold! Is it Nickelodeon, Fox Kids? I dunno, but I don't own it I know that much!! I'm pretty sure it's Nickelodeon (I could always go read disclaimers on some other fics, and the spelling of Pattaki, to see but that would be too sensible)!!! Cya!!!:} 

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